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Once the rarest of rare items, team jerseys are now available to just about anyone. |
I had an interesting "discussion" the other night with a friend that used to work in sports media many years ago. I'd call it an "argument" instead of a discussion, because it did get a little emphatic at times, but I'd prefer to call my interactions with my old friend "discussions" to avoid the connotation that there may have been ill feelings involved. I like her too much for that.
The "discussion" revolved around how modern-day fans of pro sports teams have what I believe to be too much investment in their teams, and that they don't really understand that there should be more of a separation between professional athletes, who have earned their status on the fields of play, and those that can only experience the athletes' success vicariously.
The topic came up because, in a phone call, she sounded a little surprised that I did not bother to watch the Celtics' victory parade through Boston following their 18th NBA championship. I told her that I've never been interested in such things, probably because most of Boston's championship parades happened during the period of my life when I was a professional sports journalist, and the rule of thumb for that was to maintain distance between being impartial and having a rooting interest.
The closest I ever got to participating in one of those duck boat rallies was after one of the Patriots' early Super Bowl victories, when I arrived home at Logan Airport at about the same time as the rolling rally was making its way through the streets of the city in 20-degree cold. Fortunately, the parade was nowhere near the tunnels and Southeast Expressway headed southbound, and thus I avoided being trapped amid the merriment.
My bosses never asked me to cover one of those things, probably because they knew I disliked being in the midst of unruly crowds -- and also because I had made it clearly known that I thought those events were not appropriate for serious journalists to cover. I wasn't even remotely interested in playing catch with Tom Brady as his duck boat rolled by. I didn't feel any need to make myself part of the story. Besides, I'm pretty sure I would have dropped the pass.
If that sounds a little snooty of me, so be it. At least I'm consistent. I believe in the separation of Church and State, and I believe even more in the separation of the playing field and the cheap seats.
One thing that really irks me is the proliferation of replica pro sports uniforms in the stands -- and, it goes without saying, in the streets along these championship parades. Nothing rubs me the wrong way more than seeing a 350-pound man in his 50s trying to squeeze into an undersized Tom Brady replica No. 12 shirt for which he probably paid a dollar a pound. But I'm equally miffed at looking down from the press box into a crowd of 60,000 people and seeing maybe four-fifths of those people wearing some sort of replica jersey.
I'll tell you why.
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Me in my Post 93 uniform. |
I earned the right to wear two sports uniforms in my lifetime -- the baseball uniforms of Mansfield High School and the Foxboro Post 93 American Legion team. And, given the limited scope of my abilities, I had earned both by the skin of my teeth.
My first Mansfield varsity uniform was a hand-me-down that dated at least to the early 1950s. I was one of just three players relegated to uniforms that weren't even as current as those worn by the JV team, because the school ordered too few uniforms and I wasn't as good as the players that were told they could wear the new uniforms. The only saving grace was that my uniform was No. 9 -- Ted Williams' number.
The next year, I earned one of the "real" varsity uniforms, and wore it proudly. I'd like to say I made No. 12 a Boston-area icon long before that skinny kid from Michigan did, but at least I wore it -- sort of like Steve Kuberski's No. 33 for the Celtics before the Hick from French Lick made it his.
For the Post 93 team, I wore three uniforms -- Nos. 11, 19 and 23. I got to keep No. 19 after my last season because the Legion post was buying new uniforms for the next year, and I had that for a long time before giving it to someone that needed something warm to wear for a cold night on the Cape. I never saw it again.
Point being, I earned those uniforms.
I grew up a Red Sox fan first and foremost, and yes, I hoped that someday I'd grow up and be able to wear one as a member of the team. The Talent Gods ruled otherwise, and I accepted my fate, entering a new career in sports journalism knowing that it was not my place to be wearing the uniforms of the people I covered. The only way I hoped I could reach across that divide was that, on the day I retired as a beat writer covering the Patriots, I hoped they would present me with a jersey with my name on the back and the number stemming from the number of years I covered them. I never would have worn the shirt, but I would have framed it and hung it in a place of honor.
Alas, that tradition ended a long time ago. The last reporter I know to have been given a jersey was the late Dick Cerasuolo of the Worcester Telegram & Gazette, who covered the Patriots from their inception in 1960 to his retirement at the start of the 2000 season. When I retired in 2018, the Patriots got me a cake and a football autographed by all of the media members on the beat at the time. Like Brady's footballs, I sometimes have to pump up that ball a little to keep it at an acceptable PSI level.
But I will admit, when I was in high school, I spied a small ad in The Sporting News, which I used to buy religiously, that piqued my interest.
It was from the KMPro Co., a hat manufacturer in Boston that provided most of the major league teams with their official caps. They were offering the real caps, not cheap replica knock-offs, for sale -- the same caps as worn by the players, sized for personal fit, for the ungodly sum of $20 (including shipping) in 1970. That would be about $175 today, adjusted for inflation.
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Je me souviens: Les Expos. |
So, I bought one. But I didn't buy a Red Sox hat, nor that of any more tradition-rich team. It was the tri-color chapeau of the Montréal Expos, still a relatively new expansion franchise, selected because I just thought it was the coolest thing ever. It had the full leather forehead strap and the delicately woven embroidered logo -- the latter of which caused no limit of consternation to those that, unfamiliar with the Expos, couldn't figure out what the "elb" in the front of the cap meant.
I loved that cap and wore it a lot. And when a rainstorm shrunk my cheap woolen Post 93 cap well under my 7⅜-inch hat size, I started wearing it in my Legion games. I was proud to wear that hat, even though it would still be about five or six years before I would see Les Expos in person.
I also bought two "Starter" satin warmup jackets in the late 1980s, one for the Chicago Bears and one for the San Francisco 49ers, because they reminded me of my high school letter jacket (which I had outgrown) for their comfort and warmth. A few years later, I had "outgrown" those (mostly in the belly area) and I gave them to my father, who didn't follow pro sports and just enjoyed having nice jackets to wear in his retirement years.
And that's the extent to which I ever wanted to wear pro sports paraphernalia. I got my share of free hats and shirts and other knick-knacks from the Patriots in 42 years of covering them. I put the key rings to use and maybe stashed a t-shirt away for work around the yard, but most everything else I gave away. I've bought a few baseball caps in later years -- a blue Expos cap to replace the worn-out tri-color, an Orioles' cap bought at Camden Yards, a few Washington Nationals hats because I loved their use of the old Senators' "W" on front (but those are now on the shelves because red caps look too much like MAGA identification). But when I bought a traditional Red Sox cap after their first recent championship and wore it to a Patriots' training camp practice, I took so much shit from my fellow reporters that I stashed it away and don't even know where it is today.
I have never bought a replica jersey for any team, however, and I would never have worn it in public even if I did. It would seem the same as sacrilege. I didn't earn that jersey from giving my blood, sweat and tears to the team it represents. I have no right to it.
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Does this guy really think he played for the Chargers? |
Growing up, I saw those uniforms as the ultimate symbol of achievement. They were the rarest of rare things, not to be worn by mere mortals. And I still feel the same way today. It turns my stomach to see someone that would require two seats on an airliner wearing Brady's jersey, knowing that the most athletic thing that individual does is raising a fork to his mouth.
A few years back, Sports Illustrated did an article on the topic of how attitudes have changed over the last 40 years over public accessibility to authentic pro uniforms. The writer spoke to numerous researchers and psychologists and came away with the conclusions that fans have a burning need to feel invested in the teams they support because of the high cost of following them. Whether it's season tickets (a small fortune), game-day parking and concessions, or even as simple as the markups to your media bills for viewing packages, fans feel the need to take their loyalty up to another level and to personally identify with those teams by wearing the same uniforms -- as if they are also members of the teams because of their personal investments in them.
I keep trying to tell fans that the teams really don't love them the same way in return. The teams USE them. They take the money gleefully and often promise a return on the investment by promising championships, but those promises are rarely fulfilled. And if things turn bad, fans will boo despite their professed love -- and players will say harsh things to the media about how their fans should support them more. It's just human nature.
What's more, the prices go up every year, and the fans foolishly dig deeper and pay.
I'm not one of those people who will tell you that people should not be spending money so that billionaire owners can pay their players millions of dollars to play a kid's game, and then have the owners coercing taxpayers to spend more money for their billion-dollar stadiums. If I was, I wouldn't have had a job for 42 years. Sure, it sounds like a horrible misappropriation of funds, especially when food costs too much and other basic human needs are ignored because they can't get funding. Here in Massachusetts, we reached a compromise with that cycle because Robert Kraft had to spend his own money to buy the team, and then a lot more of his own money to build the stadium and later renovate it, although he did get a good chunk of change from the state to fix the parking lots. All that helped make Kraft a much richer man that he already was, but fans got their desired return from their investments in the form of six Super Bowl championships and two decades of consistent contention for championships.
A lot of people elsewhere in this nation get bilked out of their money by team owners, but at least the Patriots have given them something back. But it's always short-term love. Just think back to how fans roasted former coach Bill Belichick on social media and sports-talk radio every day during the 2023 season, which was the direct opposite of "In Bill We Trust." And if Jerod Mayo struggles this fall, the cycle will turn back in the other direction faster than Belichick's new 24-year-old galpal can spend his money.
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These guys really look foolish. |
My feeling about replica uniforms is simple.
Buy them for the kids, not yourself. You look like an idiot wearing the uniform of a man in his 20s that has incredible athletic gifts, where the best you can do is get through an afternoon of lawn-mowing without spraining an ankle. But the book of life for your kids has yet to be written. It's OK for them to idolize their sports heroes. Maybe if you're really lucky, your kid will be so inspired that he or she will become one of the 0.03 percent of all high school athletes that will go on to become a professional. And if not, at least you did something nice for your son or daughter and didn't embarrass yourself in front of them in the process.
Speaking of social media and sports-talk radio, here's another thing that grinds my gears.
I could never last in a job as a sports-talk host, and here's why. Too many times when I happen to be listening -- probably because I got in the car and had forgotten to tune away from the station that had the play-by-play the night before -- I hear callers try to make their points about the teams they are either praising or damning by using the personal pronoun "we." As in:
Host: Jocko in Malden, you're next.
Caller: Yeah, first time, long time. Thanks for taking my call. Yeah, why is Pavetta giving up so many homers? We have to get rid of him. We're not going to win these close games if he can't stop giving up dingers. It's killing us!
Notice how that was phrased. The caller used "we" as if to imply that he was somehow involved in the management decisions of the Red Sox or as if he was or had been a member of the team. My first reaction would be to immediately stop the caller and ask him to pull out a copy of the latest Red Sox media guide and show me exactly where his name appears in the listing of management or on the all-time team roster.
And I'd be fired for it, as being elitist scum. Which I am. I just don't believe anyone is entitled to use a personal pronoun in regard to a professional sports team unless you were actually employed by it. And that doesn't include a job as a beer-pourer at a concession stand on the third level of Gillette Stadium.
My friend did not agree with me. I'm sure she thinks I'm as scummy an elitist as I am in real life. But I covered the Patriots for 42 years and I'll never use "we" to refer to my association with that team. It will always be "they." And rightfully so.
That stance of mine did once result in a rather humorous (at least to me) episode quite a few years back, however, and now I'm ready to reveal it.
Long before he had a radio show of his own on WBZ-FM, former Boston Herald writer Michael Felger frequently guested on WEEI's "The Big Show" hosted by Glenn Ordway, who was recently inducted into the Mass. Broadcasters Hall of Fame. Ordway used a rotating crew of guest hosts, and as Felger had been a host on a small station with an even smaller signal after leaving the Herald, he returned quickly to the 'EEI fold when the other station ended its locally-based programs.
Now, I was not a big fan of Felger's when he was on the Patriots beat for the Herald, for reasons I won't get into here. But one day, as I was listening to Ordway's show, Felger let loose with an unmistakable personal pronoun when referring to the Patriots, and that went right up my backside.
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Felger: What's this 'we' stuff? |
But I had a way of calling him out for it without getting too personal.
In those days, Ordway's show had a segment called "The Whiner Line." Fans could call that station at any time of day and leave a recording with whatever pithy and anonymous comment they had in mind, and Ordway and his staff would choose the best and air them at the end of his show every day.
So, I prepared myself. I've always been able to mimic other voices, so I cranked mine up about five octaves and cleared my throat enough times to make my voice sound as if it was the product of a six-pack-a-day smoking habit. Then I applied the thickest Boston accent I could muster, and I dialed the number.
"Hey, Fel-GAH," I said. "What's this 'we' stuff? When did YOU play fah the Pats?" Click.
Very few calls to the Whiner Line made it to broadcast, but mine did the very next day. And Felger happened to be guesting in studio again, and his fellow hosts let him have it.
It was priceless. I laughed in solitude because I didn't dare tell others on the beat at the time, but the story eventually got out -- I really do have a big mouth -- and most in my circle of friends applauded my effort.
These days, I'd probably let that go. I'm no longer in the sports media, and I don't have to wage the us-vs.-them battle that it had eventually become. But I still get a little frosted when I see news anchors on the nightly telecasts wearing Celtics hats and acting like fans, crossing that imaginary line between journalist and participant. It's just not right.
Besides, I'd look pretty stupid wearing a Caitlin Clark jersey.